How I Became a Stay-at-Home Mom
Prior to marrying my husband, I was a single mom of my two older children Elijah and Mj. From the age of 17, I always had a job. As a single parent, I put myself through college and completed my bachelor’s and my master’s degrees. When I was 22, I secured a home for my two children and I to live. I was always in control of my household income. I was the bread-winner.
When Elijah and Mj were ages 9 and 7, I met my husband Travis. Two years later we got married. About three months after we got married, Travis presented me with the option of staying home to be a stay-at-home mom (SAHM).
Although the opportunity to stay home sounded enticing, I honestly didn’t feel very comfortable with staying home. I was so used to working that it felt a little surreal to me. Travis said he understood how I felt and for me to think about it. He said whichever decision I made, to stay home or to work, he would support.
I didn’t come to the decision to be a SAHM right away. It took me a few months to decide. Staying home and relying on my partner’s income to care for our family was a very foreign concept to me. Not only was I more accustomed to working, but I was not raised in a home environment with a SAHM. My mother was a career woman and a single mom, too. She served in the U.S. Army and then established a career in the nursing field until her retirement. I didn’t even know what that felt like to have one parent stay home.
After thinking things over, I decided not to be a SAHM and continue working at my teaching job. I just didn’t feel ready. But as I continued working, I found I couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to be a SAHM.
I talked about it with a close friend of mine and she said she thought I should give it a try. She said I never had the chance to stay home with my children since I had been a single mom. I realized she was right. I could at least give it a try and if I didn’t like it, then I could always go back to work.
My final day as a working mother was in December of 2011. I would say after about two months of staying home, I fell in love with my new role as a stay-at-home-mom. No, it wasn’t an immediate feeling of love because I had to let go of a lot of angst and fears. I worried about if I had made the right decision and would we truly make it on one income.
I also felt like I was doing something wrong. I worried about what others would think about me. But soon I let go of all those negative thoughts and I started focusing on the joys of being a SAHM.This is also where I had to start trusting in God and His plans and will for our family.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” -Jeremiah 29:11
I also soon realized being a SAHM is truly a job, no make that a career. You may not get a pay check, but you certainly do put in the work hours because it is hard work! I quickly developed a greater appreciation for moms who stay home to care for their family.
It has been 5.5 years since I took a leap of faith and started my stay-at-home-mom journey. Yes, there are some challenging times I face, like if I’m really tired and just want some time alone. But there are so many joys that far outweigh the challenges. Becoming a SAHM is one of the best decisions I made and I am very happy with my new “career”!